Pharmacist

[steve50]

Pharmacist's MondayUpon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbingwife. Tearfully she explained,"It's the druggist. He insulted me terribly this morning on thephone. I had to call multiple times before he would even answer thephone."Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront thedruggist and demand an apology. Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him,"Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it. This morning the alarmfailed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfastand hurried out to the car, just to realize that I'd locked the housewith both house and car keys inside and had to break a window to getmy keys."Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later,when I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire.""When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting forme to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on thesepeople, all the time the darn phone was ringing off the hook."He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cashregister drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. Ihad to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels and the phone wasstill ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cashdrawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfumebottles on it. Half of them hit the floor and broke.""Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finallygot back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to usea rectal thermometer. As God is my witness, all I did was tell her!"

 

[Knobhead]

When you have had a - "I hate my job day", try this:

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section.

You will need to purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson. Be certain you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the drapes, and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed during your therapy. Change to very comfortable clothing and lie down on your bed.

Open the package and remove the thermometer.

Carefully place it on the bedside table so that it will not become chipped or broken.

Take out the material that comes with the thermometer and read it.

You will notice that in the small print there is a statement:

"Every rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson is personally tested"

Now close your eyes and repeat out loud five times:

"I am so glad I do not work for quality control at the Johnson and Johnson Company.