Dear Mark Stewart - thank you so much for indulging my curiosity! My wife is one of those 'shielded' people as she is highly vulnerable, and I, because of that and also because I do not have a spleen, are both incarcerated at home - so I look for 'intellectual' escape from it all.
I am only interested in why your original set-up failed. The sage advice of pc1966 will set you right on the required modifications to your electric brewery to arrive at a reliable, safe and effective system.
The pristine condition of the innards of your relay(s) tell me the failure mode was something to do with the contacts of the relay and its base, and the insightful observation by westward10 that the base almost certainly does not have an adequate current handling rating. As an aside, the relay
may well have coped if the leads had been connected to it directly - I can find no commentary on line which questions the current handling capability of the relay itself but as they say 'the absence of evidence is not evidence of absence'. The pins of the relay in contact with the base contacts has been inadequate to pass a
steady state current of circa 25A for more than a short period.
The contactor pc1966 pointed you to is beefy enough to cope.
I strongly recommend you have your installation inspected and tested out by a competent electrician. I am sure there will be an EF member itching for a sample of your brew!